Ring My Bell – Reserving judgment at first. Weird use of the term “Ring My Bell” – including the use of the phrase “you’re appreciating my bell”. I totally don’t get it. Must be a Myspace thing.

4 Minutes (Peter [Oakenfold] Saves NY Edit) – YAY! I am dancing. Soon I will vogue. Oh yes.

4 Minutes (Junkie XL Remix Edit) – Totally reminiscent of some other remix I can’t quite put my finger on. (Donovan, you are vindicated!) It almost sounds like someone threw some Britney vocals in there from “Stronger”! Song takes an interesting and cinematic turn. Nice.

Give It 2 Me (Oakenfold Remix Edit) – YAY! I am on the elliptical… in my head. Love what happens at 1:08. Now I step off the elliptical and just start dancing. Amazingly freaking good remix. Best to date. Thank you Oakenfold! Song gets even better at 4:01, as if that can be imagined. Awesome-o.

“4 Minutes” really took a long time to grow on me. At first, I thought it was almost unlistenable. But it did grow on me. However, I continued to find Timbaland’s signature style on the piece much too oppressive. And the “Madd-onn-a” refrain was more annoying than funny. I’m hoping the rest of Hard Candy is stronger than “4 Minutes.”

“Candy Shop” – eh, annoying. Signature Timba Pharrel licks. I think this song will be better remixed.

“4 Minutes” – you grew on me!!

“Give It 2 Me” – love it! Hook draws you in instantly. The beat really just flows. Love that 80’s-style Madonna bleat. Can’t wait to hear remixes of this one! Really catches fire at 1:16.

“Heartbeat” – I’m being patient. Can’t help but think this is reminiscent of Paris Hilton’s “Heartbeat” or whatever it was. Pass for now. 2:25 makes me sad. 2:34 restores my hope.

“Miles Away” – this isn’t a Winger cover, is it? Can’t help but feel like Timba is remixing “Power of Goodbye” with this one. I find myself wishing Stewart Price had touched this. Pretty chorus though. Thumbs up. This could be a great club anthem. It gets better as it plays.

“She’s Not Me” – didn’t Hilary or Britney do a song with this title? Kinda funky. I could see this video on roller skates more so than “Sorry”. I don’t know, something weird about Madonna singing about jealousies and teenage relationship dramas. I think 80’s Madonna could have really rocked this one, but now there’s too much Evita in ‘08 Madonna’s voice. Moving on…

“Incredible” – YUCK. Sounds like something Mariah would have done. Something weird happens at 2:30 but it feels forced. She started to channel “Like a Virgin” at 4:00. Then it gets psychedelic. Eh. It’s all really forced.

“Beat Goes On” – like the way it starts but hate the grunts and muttering. Interesting disco vibe. Wish Stewart Price was here! Or Mirwais!

“Dance 2Night” – Is that JT? I guess this is the album’s banger. The word “unabashed” comes to mind. And the lyrics are just rather pandering. Whatever. This will also be remixed really well.

“Spanish Lesson” – “La Isla Bonita” meets “Barracuda” meets that one JT song. Oh no, please no more bad Spanish Madonna. Yuck. Pass. Pass. Pass.

“Devil Wouldn’t Recognize You” – For some reason, Madonna songs since “Ray of Light” have regular pop hooks, but they’re a lot thinner than regular pop. Strange, atmospheric. OK, back to this song. Sounds like something Kelly Clarkson would have done. It’s not a bad song. I like it. “Even the devil wouldn’t recognize you but I do.” I like that lyric.

“Voices” – Hate the intro. Love the beat. I have high expectations :20s in. Not bad. Kind of a Depeche Mode thing going on. (A very loosely interpreted Depeche Mode, that is!) (Yeah, now I know why – “Let’s play Master and Servant” – not so subtle I guess!) Well this song never really seems to get going. Fast forward, and it ends the album on a pretty dramatic note. A note which seems completely out of place on this album.

Overall impressions: I’m sure this will take a few listens to grow on me. It’s nowhere near as good as Confessions, heck it’s not even as good – from a purely bangin’, groovin’ standpoint – as Blackout. Then again, I owe it a few more full listens. I just feel like Timba’s thing is on the downward escalator and I can’t help but feel like a few of these songs are already stale. We’ll see.

For those who have heard the album – what do you think?